It Kills To Be In Love
by teary-eyedgodess
Summary: love hurts, ray had to learn that the hard way. ray has an after school job that tala makes him do and is ashamed of. can kai help him take away his fears? read and find out! REVIEW PLZZZZ! one love
1. Chapter 1 why dose he do this to me?

ok i'm the biggest lover of kai, ray, tala, max, tyson, brooklyn and others so i just had to write this story i was dieing to get this off my chest... okay so no more talking lets start with the story, by the way this story actually happened to a friend of mine... its sad i havent talked to her in years... well ENJOY!

**It kills to be in love**

The bell rang about twenty minutes ago and as usual Kai was late for class, but that didn't worry him. Lets just say he wasn't average, he was a whole lot smarter then the rest of the students, not to sound conceited but was more attractive then the other kids. Also not like most of the boys in the school he didn't have an over raging attraction for girls. Quite frankly he liked being late, Kai enjoyed walking down the empty hallway were he could think and take in his environment. Kai walked threw two hallways and past one coor door were he heard yelling. It didn't sound like any teachers he had nor the principle. He turned the next corner to come upon a young boy about his age. The boy had the nicest silky flowing black hair, wrapped in some kind of hair tie. His facial feature wasn't like the rest of the students his neko origins showed a lot. He had the brightest and beautiful shinning amber eyes, ( I love the color amber!) full lips with to little fangs coming from the sides of his mouth. If u look closely it seems like whiskers around his mouth, strange, as it was Kai was fond of the kid even if he didn't know him. Kai also noticed another male with spiky red hair and ice blue eyes. He was taller than the raven hared one. Kai could see the fear in the smaller boy's eyes as the red head grabbed the boy's wrist and dragged him down the hallway and out the school doors.

Confused and curious Kai followed them from about nine feet away. He continued to follow them until they finally came to a stop in a dim ally. Kai watched behind a garbage can as the red head violently kissed the weaker one. He grasped the back of his neck to make the kiss more intense. Kai knew it was bit "stalkerish" and perverted to watch to people kiss like this but he couldn't help but watch. The taller male pulled away to regain his breath.

" tala please don't do this…lets just." the fragile boy was cut off by a fist to his stomach, making him jerk forward gasping for air.  
" DON'T YOU DARE TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" a slap came to his face as the taller male pulled out a pocketknife and slashed the amber eye's arm. A yelp escaped his lips as another slap came to his now red cheek.

Kai was in shock as he watched the larger male beat up the smaller boy. He wanted to do something about it but he couldn't. Its not like he could have ran up to them and told the guy to fuck off. He did follow them they could have pressed charges if they wanted to. The neko-jin cried knowing the one he loved so deeply would hurt him like this, not only physically but also mentally. As the last punch came to his jaw he collapsed backward onto the hard filled tears and bloody concrete floor.

" GET UP!" the Russian yelled, " IM DOING THIS SO YOU CAN UNDERSTAND THE PAIN I WENT THROUGH YOU KNOW I HATE IT WHEN U TALK TO OTHER GUYS!" He continued to shout.

Tala heard something ruffle near the garbage and drew his attention that way but just ignored it, he gave the boy one hard kick in the ribs then yelled at him to go to work then return straight home. The red head walked off like if nothing happened, leaving the neko-jin bleeding and helpless on the pavement. Once Kai was aware that the coast ways clear he ran to the boy's aid. Kai kneeled down and put his arm around the boy's waist and one hand under his head supporting it up. The amber-eyed beauty fluttered his eyes open to stare up into crimson eye, that caused him to flinch squealing out of Kai's arms. Kai could see the fears in his eyes; hay he would be scared to if a man was hovering over his body after someone just beat the crap out of him.

"Its all right don't be scared" Kai tried to reinsure him, pulling him closer to his warm body.  
" TALA!" the boy screamed struggling from Kai again.  
" Shhh is ok…. I'm Kai uum I think we go to the same school judging by your uniform?" Kai asked trying to change the subject.  
"Yeah I think we do" he finally started to relax" "m-m-my names ray" he stuttered as he started to regain his breath, ray looked straight up into the eyes of a god. Kai was quite the charmer ray hated the fact such an attractive guy like Kai had to see him like this. Those beautiful strong cheekbones and his skin looked so soft ray desperately wanted to feel his face. This guy must be Russian he has such great hair. What a wonderful shade of light and dark blue, his embrace was so nice and warm to…. WAIT! What was he saying he has a boyfriend that he loves deeply and he loves him to He really does! He's his world…. His everything.

It took awhile for ray to realize he was gawking at the one comforting him, he quickly snapped out of that and sat up on his own.

"Thanks" ray said calmly  
"No problem…ray is it?" Kai asked as he got up stretching out a hand to help ray up. He took the hand and pulled himself up, still holding his slashed arm trying to cover the mark his lover left.  
"Yeah…Um well… I got to get to work" Ray told Kai and started darting off.  
"Well u don't look to good maybe I should walk you there" Kai offered.

Ray desperately wanted to crawl up into a ball and cry, yelling at Kai to leave him alone and to forget any of this had happened. But he couldn't… why did this Kai person care so much. He was fine; he could take care of himself…along side Tala.

"Umm you really d-don't have t-to" ray stuttered, as him and Kai began to walk out the ally while people stared, giving them dirty looks. Rays arm was still bleeding but he didn't mind. It was like talking to Kai made him feel safe and all his pain went away.

" But I want to" Kai replied  
" Ok I guess" was rays response.

They continued to walk down the street side by side, like some kind of puppy love couple. The silence as they walked was killer; someone had to break it. Even all the street cars and people talking around them still made it seem dead silent. Ray was feeling really nervous no guy ever cared about him… well besides Tala. He loved him and knew he did. He only hit him because he wanted someone to share him…even his pain.

"You have really cute whiskers," Kai said breaking the silence and ray deep in thought.

Ray blushed furiously dipping his head down to cover his embarrassment. "Thanks".  
Kai smiled to himself looking up into the clear blue sky with his hands stuffed in his pockets, Ray noticed that from the corner of his amber eye and eased up a bit.

"So what do you do?" Kai asked looking back down at ray.

The neko-jin tensed up again and started turning red. It wasn't like he was ashamed of his job; he just wasn't proud of it…ok what the hell! He was ashamed.

" I dance." Ray said point blank  
" Urban? Jazz? Traditional?" Kai questioned him.  
"No… erotic" ray replied trying not to catch Kai's gaze.  
"Really? Umm you like it? Don't you go around dancing for men and women in your underwear? Or in some occasions sleep with them for extra cash?" Kai asked curiously.

Ray felt tears build up in his eyes. He didn't want to answer Kai's questions. He wished he hadn't have told him. He didn't want to do it; Tala made him do it. Tala trusted him not to get into any relationships with his "customers". He allowed him to have sex with other people mostly men and still love him. Plus ray wasn't capable of cheating on Tala on his own personal time. He'd find out some how and kill him. He really loved Tala, he truly did… he'd do anything for him...Anything.

Kai looked over at ray seeing the pain and tears in his eyes was enough to make him cry he wasn't the type to cry ether, he wasn't trying to sound rude or make ray feel bad he just wanted to know. Something inside him felt weird he couldn't help but want to know so much about ray. Why did he care anyway this was a misunderstanding. He wouldn't have been here right now if he didn't follow ray. He wouldn't have met him; he wouldn't feel this way. Guilty…guilty for not stopping the fight with ray and his friend.

"Hey I'm sorry you don't have to answer me, I can see you don't feel comfortable. Plus I already know what erotic dancers do." Kai spoke out trying to make ray feel better.

Ray slightly nodded and pulled his hair out of his face. After what seemed like nine years walking they finally reached their destination. PINK PANTHA'S SEXI CLUB HOPPIN! Was the name of the place ray worked.

" Well, I got to go now, it was nice talking to you Kai" ray said pulling the heavy steal door open. Still facing Kai but not looking directly at him.  
" Yea you to, I guess I'll see you around school then?" Kai asked  
" Yea maybe…" ray replied turning around and went inside, the door slammed behind him.

Kai wanted to walk away but the thought of ray dancing and shaking his nice booty he got to check out when the red head dragged him out of the school earlier. Was making him slightly stiff he had to go take a look, he wouldn't forgive himself if he didn't. Kai turned around and pulled the door open and slipped in at the back, The dim lights were making him harder. Kai sat down and focused on the stage. A tall white male was up there giving some old man a lap dance. Once again Kai felt like a pervert, he never came to one of "these" but he heard about it. His grandfather always came to these things and all the students in his class talked about it but Kai never bothered. He was disgusted at the guys in the audience but he liked the one on stage he was really working his nerves. Afterwards there was howling and whistling, then the guy got off stage with a few dollars.

A man in some kind of D.J box started speaking.

"ALIGHT! GENTALMEN! NOW YOU ALL KNOW HIM AND LOVE HIM! TAKE OUT YOUR CHECK BOOKS AND GET READY FOR KITTY!" the man yelled with great enthusiasm. Once again the lights went dim but this time a glistening red light fell upon the stage. Following with the light a figure appeared. Music started to play, to Kai's surprise he knew the song naught girl by beyonce. The figure began to move and sway their hips. As the person approached into the red light Kai could see who it was. It was ray in a very sexy revealing outfit; He really liked the way ray looked in a really tight hot red and black Speedo like costume. Kai could see a whole new side of ray he never thought he'd ever see before. He figured ray was a clean guy cause he never had any showing pubic hairs. In that costume it would kind of be disgusting to see hair. Ray had a sexy build not to skinny not too big but just right, like he loved his men!

Ray kept on swinging and grinding his hips "ohwee!" it drove Kai crazy. He was really getting hard, extremely stiff. Ray was doing a really hot strip tease on the steal pole, bringing forward his pelvis and letting it go with a light swaying rhythm. Later on ray proceeded to work his way off the stage and into the crowd. He stopped at a middle-aged man and sat on his lap. Ray began to grind his tight well-fit booty down against the man's erected member. Ray dwelled on clashing his ass on the man's member for a short time being. The man gave out a loud moan and stuffed 100-dollar bill in rays Speedo piece. Ray got off the satisfied male and gave him a light kiss on his cheek and walked back on stage. The horny men in the audience began to haul and shout once again as ray got down on his knees and crawled towards them, in a sexy kitty like way. He started to purr as more perverts through money on stage and some came up to ray himself and placed the bills on his body. Kai was getting more agitated, he wanted to grab ray off stage and fuck him until he couldn't fuck no more. He started stroking his own member trying to steady his tension his mind was in a different place at the time. Kai finally had noticed that ray had gotten off stage awhile ago and he should stop touching himself. Just in time the lights got dim again for another performer to go on and he could slip out through the same way he came in.

Kai walked outside and leaned against the wall. Placing his naughty hands in his pockets, hoping the cool air would calm him down. He was waiting for ray wishing he'd come out soon, so he could grab him and make love to him right here and there on the sidewalk. Yet again that was another sick daydream of his. On the other hand he could have missed him, he was sitting there for awhile pleasuring himself. Then the steal door swung open breaking Kais trail of thought. He snapped and turned his head to see who had given him a slight shock, to his surprise it was ray.

"Hey!" Kai hollered trying to get rays attention but he kept walking away. Ray assumed it was one of the guys from the club following him or something. He could feel the hair on his arms and whiskers rise up. He was terrified but didn't know what to do. Finally Kai caught up to him and tapped him on the shoulder making ray give out a throatily gasp. Ray twirled his head to the side to stare into the eyes of his predator. A small sigh escaped his lips when he noticed it was Kai. He figured that he waited for him the whole time outside.

" Wow! Calm down it just me Kai? From earlier?" Kai attempted to refresh rays memory.

"Yea I remember you, Kai… I…I just thought u were someone else that's all." ray replied calming down.

"Like who?" Kai asked

"Know one important" ray responded.

"Oh" Kai replied

"Kai did you wait out there for me the whole time?" ray asked a bit nervous.

"Actually I came inside." Kai stated with a smirk on his face.

"Oh" ray began to turn red and dipped his head down letting his raven bangs fall down his face.

"I think you looked really great REALLY, REALLY GREAT!" Kai expressed.

"Thu-thanks" the neko-jin stuttered.

"No need to be shy ray, you have a great body why not flaunt it" Kai reputed.

"Um I guess" ray said.

They continued to walk down the street, nether of them said a word. Ray wanted to talk to Kai but knew he shouldn't. Tala would be furious if he found out that he was talking to another male, Especial an attractive male. They kept walking until ray suddenly stopped.

"IlivejustthereI'llseeyoulater" ray slurred and began to walk away, but Kai grabbed his arm and swung him around. Their faces were now inches apart.

"Why in such a rush?" Kai asked tilting his head down, bringing his lips closer to rays. Ray gazed lovingly into Kai's eyes, wishing he could kiss those sweet rose pink lips.

"Kai…" a small whisper came from rays lips closing his eyes in the moment.

Quickly ray realized what he was going to do and pushed Kai away. Kai watched dumbfounded as the nervous wreck ran up the street, up the house steps and went inside. Once ray was fully inside he leaned against the wooden door and sighed.

"Welcome home kitty" a voice came out to ray.

"Hey baby! I missed you!" ray replied searching the house for his lover.

He finally stumbled upon Tala at the living room window. He had the curtains slightly pulled aside as he continued to watch outside. When Tala turned around to look at his kitten, ray could see what seemed like anger in his eyes but he didn't know why. Then it hit him like a bus to an old lady; he must have watched him and Kai outside just now. Tala was a very jealous man he had a lot of anger built up inside he just couldn't take seeing someone he loved especial ray be that close to another person in that way.

"Hey baby" ray greeted slowly walking towards Tala wrapping his arms around his waist, squeezing the red head close to him. Tala breathed in deeply and exhaled running his fingers threw his kittens hair. Ray really liked that he looked up into tala's ice blue eyes and kissed him passionately, losing up his grip. Tala picked up ray easily and cared him up to their room, with his arms wrapped around talas neck as his legs around his lovers slim waist. The red head walked up the stairs never breaking the kiss and kicked the door open. Tala walked in and sat on the bed, with ray still on his lap. Ray broke free from the kiss panting for air. He shifted closer in the Russian's embrace. The neko-jin moved to pull off his shirt as Tala did the same. Tala tossed ray over on his back, taking his pants and pushing them down exposing his boxers and the flesh beneath. "I love you" he pants while sucking and nibbling on rays nipple." I love you too" ray moaned aware that the Russian was stroking and pumping his throbbing member with his free hand. The red head continued to massage rays member and questioned him as well.

"Who was the guy ray?" Tala asked cupping his mouth around ray's cock, licking the tip of the head.

Ray moaned and pulled tala's hair urning for release "hummm know… One... OH GOD TALA!"

With his toes curled and head back ray gave out a loud groan, tala was sucking hard and grazing his fingers over the inner side of ray's thighs. Ray felt the sudden pleasure rise to the tip of his member as tala continued to playfully lick and stroke his cock. Moments later he Came filling tala's mouth with his seeds. Tala swallowed it and even licked some that spilled on ray's thigh. Tala slid up so he was face to face with ray. He laid on top him opening his legs to make him and ray more comfortable.

"Don't lie to me ray" Tala began to raise his voice.

Tears began to form in rays eye's Tala was very strong, he could do anything that he wanted to him. Now that he was naked lying there beneath him under tala's control He felt so useless. Ray knew that if he kept "Kai" from him he'd beat him but if he told him it just be the same. Still in thought ray felt Tala spread and lift his legs letting them rest on the Russian's shoulders. Ray knew what was going to happen Tala wasn't going to go nice and easy on him like they always did. When they made love before it was so tender, passionate and sweet, Tala was a whole different person when it came to making love. He wanted to please ray make it worth his wild hitting that very spot to make him moan.

Ray squeezed his eyes shut and felt Tala moves in slowly and pulled half out again with a slow calming rhythm.

"Now I'm going to ask you again RAY!" Tala announced pushing in ray and staying in.

Tala never called him ray when they were being intimate it was always kitty or kitten now for sure it wasn't going to be good.

"WHO WAS THE GUY RAY?" Tala yelled at ray as he pulled out then thrust hard into ray making him scream.

"Tala please… It hurts… iieh...please Tala stop I love you…please believe me he's no one" ray sobbed clawing at the bed sheets, with his head rolled back and eyes still shut tight.

The pain was unbearable with every thrust Tala questioned ray. "RAY TELL ME WHO THE GUY WAS?". Ray screamed and cried out loud in agony. He had his hands over his eyes while tears poured down his cheeks. The neko-jin had moved his legs so now his feet were down on the bed and knees were touching but still on his back. Tala was thrusting so hard into ray that the king-size bed was rattling and making sounds ray never heard before. The Russian continued to shout at ray words that made him feel even more horrible. He wanted to throw up Tala just wouldn't stop even after he came and went limp. Ray began to tremble knowing he was going to cum again. He was filled with unwanted pleasure, almost 2 hours pasted the same treatment went on. Instead of just thrusting into ray in the same way he changed angles here and there slapping, punching and scratching him as well leaving bruises all over his body. Finally it all came to a stop when ray blacked out he just couldn't take it no more but it's not like this is the first time it's happened Tala did this to him almost every waking day. As usually he left him on the bed bleeding, naked and sore hoping ray would learn his lesson for something he didn't know that he had done.

The sun shinned bright that morning burning rays bruises. He flinched and fluttered his eyes open. Ray sat up biting his lower lip trying to fight back the pain and up coming tears. He was still naked looking down at his bruised swollen thighs made tears fall down his face, wishing Tala wouldn't do the things he did to him. Ray got up and limped to the dresser and grabbed talas boxers shorts he struggled to put them on but eventually did. The sad neko-jin flicked on the radio hoping it would make him feel better but he only heard "**listen to your heart".** It only made him feel worse and he began to cry he heard the door open and Tala stepped in.

"Morning kitty" Tala greeted with arms open as he approached the neko-jin.

Ray walked slowly into his boyfriend's arms pressing his face to his chest. Ray started to sob holding his lover tight. He knew Tala hated to see him cry but he couldn't hold back his tears.

"I'm sorry Tala, I know you hate it when I cry" ray sniffed whipping away his tears.

"It's okay kitty I'm so sorry I didn't mean to hurt you its just when I saw you with that guy I just had to have you… You know? To prove your still mine." Tala whispered as close to ray's ear he could get, stroking his back to make him feel somewhat better.

Ray nodded in response.

"You know what kitty… Forget about it I trust you not to cheat on me behind my back" Tala insisted.

"I would nev…" ray pleaded

"It's alright… You know I'm sorry but I have to go, clean up and eat something you look so slim I want you to have some meat on your bones I want to see junk in the trunk" Tala winked and kissed ray on the forehead.

Ray smiled and nodded and took the Russian's hand and walked his boyfriend to the door kissing him one last time goodbye.

" I love you" the red head voiced

"I love you too" ray expressed and Tala walked out the door.

Ray shut the door and walked back up stairs to take a shower and to see how much damage Tala actually did to his body. An hour later ray came back down stairs to relax and watch some TV to keep his mind off things. Right when he was going to sit down a knock came to the door. Ray assumed it wouldn't be Tala because he never forgot anything behind well that was what he thought. The raven head opened the door to see a friendly face.

"Hey ray!" Kai greeted stepping inside ray and tala's home. Ray remembered how rude he was to Kai the day before and felt bad but soon that went away by a sudden hug from Kai.

" Oh my god ray, what happened to you?" Kai asked touching ray's cheek with his palm. Rays cheeks were swollen and bruised. His eyes were still puffy and red from crying last night and he wasn't standing straight like he always did.

"I fell!" ray snapped turning his head away from kai.

" Were, Off a cliff?" Kai asked his eyes full of concern.

"No, down the stairs...I'm so klutzy" ray said with a fake smile on his obvious hurt face.

Kai looked beyond ray's head to see if he could spot anyone, but no use.

"Explain your eyes?" Kai demanded

"I couldn't sleep" ray responded

"Ray…"Kai said in worry.

"I'm fine I can take care of myself… please just drop it… what are you doing here anyway? After I was so rude to you I was sure you wouldn't want to talk to me…" ray spoke out getting bit teary eyed.

"Listen ray the thing is ever since I saw you at school I knew I needed to get to know you. Then the time we spent walking and talking I felt as if I knew you for so long. Then that's when I saw a side of you I loved. When you were up on that pole strutting your stuff, I was so stimulated I wanted to take you right then and there"

At that moment ray began to giggle at what Kai was saying.

"And now ray! I can't keep my mind off you! I came... I came to tell you… I've been thinking about it a lot and I love you! Please accept that and I want to be with you! And I'll wait for you for as long as it takes for you to realize what you really want ray" Kai expressed pressing his lips to rays making him tremble when he felt ray slip his hand under his shirt while kissing him back passionately.

"Umm ray I want you so bad I need you right now…" Kai said pushing ray into the living room and setting him on the couch, never breaking the kiss.

"Umm Kai you taste so sweet" ray moaned as Kai pulled up his shirt throwing it aside and the same with rays. The Russian sucked on ray's neck while the neko-jin roamed his hands through Kai's navy hair. While Kai was licking rays chest he noticed scratches and bruises on him, but that didn't stop him thou his mind drifted away. He began to tug on ray sweats making them bare some flesh.

"No Kai" ray said his voice real shaky.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't have" Kai was cut off by a kiss from rays soft lips.

"We can't do this here Tala could come home" ray whispered.

"Tala?" Kai asked

"My…you know" ray nudged

"Oh ok I get it… well let's go out for a walk then?" Kai offered

"Sure I'd like that" ray accepted.

Sitting there for awhile, they both eventually put on their articles of clothing and headed outdoors. By the time they both got back it was dark out and it started to rain.

"Well that was fun" ray admitted, whipping off water on his face from the rain.

"Yeah maybe we can do it again sometime" Kai suggested.

"Yeah that be nice" Ray replied.

Kai stretched out his hand to whip away more water droplets on ray's soft peach skin. The neko-jin tilted his head to the side embracing Kai's warm touch.

"TALA!" ray snapped.

He walked in the direction of the steps, then frantically ran up them. Confused and worried Kai followed him upstairs to what seemed like rays and his boyfriend's room. There were paintings of people and pictures of ray and the guy together, he looked so happy in the pictures… what is he doing here trying to ruin what ray has with his lover. Kai felt a weird gut feeling he was sad and was very envious of "Tala" Just the thought of him touching ray provoked his envy. Kai watched as ray flicked on the answering machine to new messages and watched rays expression turn from worried to happy. He was happy to hear Tala voice on the machine telling ray he wasn't coming home that night, not even telling why. Ray gave out a loud sigh of relief knowing the Russian wasn't home to hurt him tonight…even if it meant only just for tonight. Kai's gaze shifted from ray to around the room then back to ray meeting his eyes as well.

"It was Tala" ray told him.

Oh right Tala… His boyfriend the one person keeping him and ray apart.

" Oh right" Kai said bit annoyed.

"So what do you want to do?" ray asked nervous to hear Kai's answer.

"I have an idea" Kai replied pulling off his shirt revealing his well toned muscular chest, with such great pecks.

Ray began to get stimulated at the thought of the rest of Kai's body. He knew he couldn't hold his emotions back, knowing he was still sore and bruised from tala's harsh treatment. He pounced on Kai like a wild cat pinning him down, back against the bed. Ray sunk his fangs into Kai's sweet flesh leaving little trademarks of his own; something Tala would never let him do. With Kai's free hands he pulled off rays shirt, tugging on his pants making them come off. Kai moaned when he felt ray yank off his pants and his boxer shorts he liked the way ray was being a bit rough. That left him naked for the neko-jin to judge ray was very pleased with what he saw. Meanwhile Kai was stroking his own throbbing member with his pre-cum, while ray removed the rest of his clothing. Ray sat back on top of Kai's stiff member pushing his hips down so the Russian could enter him slowly with little pain. Ray started to move up and down using his thigh muscles to make his pumps stronger. He began picking up the speed now bouncing heavily on Kai; he grabbed his for arms and pinned them down for more support. Ray never felt this much control before when he made love to Tala, he was always at the bottom never on top. Kai began to tremble knowing he was close to his peak, with a loud moan Kai came deep within ray. The raven head not there yet began bouncing up then plunging back down causing Kai to gasp and yelp in surprise of ray's power. A few more times with that ray came yelling nonsense his seeds spilled on Kai's stomach, he smirked satisfied with ray and himself. The neko-jin collapsed on Kai's chest breathing heavily as Kai licked the sweat off his forehead.

"Oh god ray that was great, I never felt that way in awhile" Kai said flipping ray over on his back so now the Russian was on top. Ray smiled ignoring his aching behind in response making his amber eyes glow with delight.

"Ray I noticed when you were on me like a wild cat" Kai smirked then his face became serious again". "You had bruises on your thighs what happened? Did I do that? If I did I'm so sorry I didn't know." Kai asked worried for his angel.

Ray looked away and pushed Kai off of him sitting up and looking in the mirror. He knew it was time for him to tell someone the way he felt and what Tala was doing to him.

"Okay Kai…" ray paused " this is what's been happening". Ray proceeded to tell the one who cared.

45-min later of tears, sobbing and heartache the whole truth was out, everything. Ray was still sitting on the bed now looking at the bed sheets. Kai side by side to him holding his hand in comfort.

" Ray? Is it okay if I…. See what he did?" Kai hesitated to ask.

"Um… ok" ray said nervously. He stood up still holding one of the sheets, covering his body. " Kai…" ray said tears forming in his eyes.

"Its okay ray, trust me" Kai tried to reinsure him.

Then ray dropped the sheets and moved his arms to the side of his body. Kai was in shock; he never noticed that many scars. His body was filled with bruises, sores, scratches and even had some bite marks near his member area… that must have hurt a lot this is what his poor angel was going through.

"Oh god ray, I should have said something sooner" Kai said getting up and hugging ray tightly.

"Oh Kai it hurts so bad. I wanted to tell you but he would have gotten mad and hurt me some more or even you. I love him… well at least I think I do… or thought I did. I didn't want to leave him I couldn't go anywhere. I had no where to go! At the time he was my everything!" ray began to sob again soaking Kai's T-shirt, that he happened to put on while ray was telling his life story.

"Shhhhhhhh it's okay ray I promise I wont let him hurt you ever again" Kai told the amber-eyed angel staring into his eyes while he ran his fingers through his silky hair."

"I love you ray"

" I love you to Kai" ray responded.

"WHAT! I CAN'T BELIEVE MY EARS!" a voice came shouting into the room it, was Tala a very anger Tala. Kai let go of ray and stood in front of him protecting him like a bodyguard would. They both had some sort of clothing on. Kai in a T-shirt and boxers and ray just in boxers. (God knows how he got them on)

"TALA?" ray called out looking over Kai's shoulder.

"COME HERE NOW RAY!" Tala demanded.

The neko-jin moved to Kai's side and walked towards Tala with fear in his eyes but Kai grabbed his wrist and pulled him back mouthing out " don't do this", ray began to sob again.

"Please Kai LET GO!" ray yelled still sobbing and yanked his hand from Kai's grasp. He slowly approached his boyfriend, looking him in the eyes. "Tala" he whispered a harsh slap came to his face making him yelp in pain.

"HOW DARE YOU BRING THIS LOW LIFE INTO MY HOUSE! IN MY BEDROOM! DID YOU SLEEP WITH HIM RAY? HUH? DID YOU? I KNOW YOU DID! I WANT TO HEAR YOU SAY IT! ADMIT YOU'RE A DIRTY LITTLE WHORE!" Tala yelled grabbing ray from his upper arms, shacking him violently.

"Tala please…" ray pleaded helpless in the red heads arms.

" JUST SAY IT! YOU PATHETIC BITCH! YOUR NOTHING A PIECE OF SHIT! YOUR WORTHLESS!" Tala yelled in his face making him sob even louder.

Tala tossed ray to the ground with a loud thump he began to kick him in the ribs. Making him cough frequently, he obviously broke something in ray's fragile body. Kai wouldn't stand there any longer and watch Tala abuse ray, he loved him and he promised he wouldn't let the red head hurt him again. Kai rushed over to rays aid and punched Tala in the stomach making him jolt forward in an awkward bending position. Tala then head butted Kai also in the stomach; his back hit the corner of the dresser making him groan in pain. Ray still sat on the floor breathing in deeply and sobbing all at the same time clutching where Tala had kicked him several times. He knew that if Tala had killed Kai it would be his entire fault. Then suddenly ray heard three loud bangs and looked up to see a lifeless bleeding Kai on the floor face down. Tala tossed away the A.K.47 landing at the side of Kai's head.

"Serves you right bitch!" Tala said walking towards ray and standing in front of him.

"And as for you I'm gon…" Tala was cut off.

When he dropped to his knees face to face with ray, blood splattered on rays face as he looked down to see a whole in Tala's chest as more blood poured out of it.

"Kitty…" the Russian said as tears fell down his cheeks.

He collapsed on the floor his lips started to leave their color and turn pale. Ray got up on his knees ignoring his own pain and pulled Tala close to him sobbing and screaming.

"TALA! PLEASE DON'T DIE! FIGHT IT! I'M NOTHING WITHOUT YOU!" ray screamed

"No…I'm ssssorry kitty…for everything…"Tala managed to say as he coughed out almost a gallon of blood. The red substance seeped from his mouth and poured on the floor.

"Kitty…promise mmmme you'll never forget me… and… try to love again…" Tala told the neko-jin

"NO TALA PLEASE!" ray sobbed even louder then he ever had before.

"I love you ray always and forever" those words were the last thing Tala said as he took his last breath.

THREE YEARS LATER

Ray kneeled down kissing the tombstone and whispered " I'll always love you Tala, now and forever". As for Kai he was sentence to eleven years in a correctional facility center for second-degree murder with a lethal weapon and 48 hours of community service. As for ray he adopted a little girl named Kenjalia, Which was what Tala always wanted kids. Even if he had a horrible temper he wanted children to raze and call his own. Till this day ray remember the night were the one he loved so dearly was gunned down by someone he loved as well. He promised he wouldn't forgive himself as he thought about suicide but he has something to live for, his baby girl Kenjalia. After all she's only a child with such innocents.

THE END.

Like oh my god! What did you think? It was kind of shit full but I just had to let tala die yea ray adopting a child… wonder how that's gonna go in the following chapters! Come on now and Kai in jail that is so hot! All the sexy guys are in jail you know trust me! Anyway review; tell me what you think so I can get started on the next chapter! Much love needed bibiiiii!


	2. Chapter 2 a new beginning

**It kills to be in love: chapter2**

Ray lay on his back in bed that night. It wasn't as hot as it us to be, the weather was getting cooler then usual. He wasn't in a deep sleep after all he couldn't sleep. Every time he closed his eyes that horrible night would replay in his mind.

"Daddy! I cant sleep" a little girls voice called out as it entered rays dark room. Ray flicked on the lamplight that brightened the place enough so he could see his daughter's face.

" What's the matter?" ray asked sitting up. " Had a another bad dream?"

"No not that! I just want to sleep in your bed pleeeeeasee dadddyyy!" the little girl begged.

She ran up to rays bed, with a blanket in her hand and pounced on the mattress. She made herself comfortable, snuggled her head on her dad's soft pillow and dozed off into a light slumber.Ray sighed and laid back down with one arm around his daughter and the other on his stomach. He eventually drifted off into a light slumber as well.

When morning hit ray was rushing to slip on his clothes, get breakfast, and get kenjalia ready and to make sure there was no lights on being unused (**_he kind of struggled with some bills_**).

"kenja! You ready sweetie?" ray hollered from the front door as he pulled on his shoes.

"Yeah daddy coming!" kanjalia skipped her way to the door, her nap sack on her back with a piece of a beagle in her hand.

She wore her favorite jeans skirt with white knee-highs and a light rose pink shirt, a small sweater draped over her tiny shoulders. She looked adorable with her hair in two pig tales with a nice bright pink bow in her silky raven hair (what did you expect?). As for ray he wore dark blue baggy jeans and a white fitted T-shirt. (Oh lets show that sexy muscle!) He wasn't that businessman he wanted to be after all he's only 19 and non-like other people his age he didn't drop out of school or get some blonde bitch knocked up. But he did want to major in…. Okay well he didn't know what he wanted to major in but he knew he needed a well education to get a better job. Non like that restaurant he works in now. When they got outside their neighbor (**_that annoying whore_**) was out; kenjalia waved at her and with little effort so did ray. The taxi was already parked outside so they both hopped in and drove off.

Ray tossed and turned in his sleep it's like if he was replaying every emotion he felt that night. He could feel the blood splatter on his face and his tears rolling down his pale cheeks. He could even hear tala's voice and feel his shallow breaths. **_I love you ray... always and forever._** Ray began to cry.

"OH TALA WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DIE! I MISS YOU SO MUCH! I NEED YOU! YOU PROMISED ME YOU WOULD NEVER LEAVE ME!" ray cried angrily. He held his face in his palms as he cried more tears of pain.

Suddenly ray heard crackling and footsteps down in what seemed like the kitchen area. Swinging his legs over to the side of the bed he stood up. His legs began to shake he didn't know why, maybe he was cold. After all he just slept in red boxers and a black T-shirt. Ray wobbled down stairs still shaken by his nightmare and by his nerves.

"Kenja? Are you down stairs, sweetie you know your not aloud to eat after 7" ray whispered as he entered the kitchen.

He gasped at the sight of a dark figure hunched over the counter. The neko-jin backed up and grabbed the nearest object and held it in his hands.

"I'm warning you, I have a weapon and I'm not afraid to use it!" ray demanded but sacred as hell.

"Oh ray, you defending yourself that's a change" the figure spoke out.

"Wh-what are you talking about, who are you? How did you get in he-he here?" ray asked his voice beginning to show of fear.

"Calm down it me" the man said and started to walk towards ray slowly.

Ray froze, he couldn't think he couldn't move he didn't know what to do. The only thing that ran through his mind was scream for tala; tala always came to his rescue when he needed him. The person began to speak again then it hit him, that voice… it was so familiar to ray. Ray stretched his arm to the right and flicked on the light. He came face to face to look up and stare into crimson eyes. The man wrapped his arms around ray's body and held him close. Ray dropped the object in his hand as he felt the person's body heat sooth him. Ray pushed the person back so he could get a good look at the stranger's face.

"K-Kai… is that really you?" ray asked in disbelief.

"Yea ray it's me" he responded with open arms.

Kai looked different, he got rid of the ridiculous blue shark fin triangles on his face and his hair grew out a little more. He gained more muscles and got a tad taller. Kai stood there waiting for his angel to respond, his white tank top (wife beater) tight to his muscular body.

"Ray this would be a really nice time to say something" Kai suggested. Rays lips began to quiver as he stared dumbfounded at Kai.

"Listen" Kai stepped towards ray again and held him tight once more." I know your confused, scared and upset but I'm here, this time for good" Kai whispered close to the neko-jins ear. **_How is it that he could read me so well, how is it that he knows how to hold me like this. _**Ray thought

ray felt Kai slip his arm around the back of his legs and pick him up. He was surprised Kai could still carry him, he did gain some weight or muscle. Ray thought Kai would have dropped him and complained on how fat he's gotten, but he didn't, he continued to carry him up the stairs and into ray's room. Kai laid him on the bed and laid on top of him, ray could feel Kai's erection touch his.

"It's been so long since we did this" Kai said between kisses. He roamed his hands up and down rays back and roamed them over his inner thigh. Ray gasped when he felt Kai slip his hand underneath his boxers and rubbed his throbbing man hood. **_He knows were to touch me and to push my limits. _**Kai continued to suck on ray's neck and massage his member.

"I missed your touch Kai I want this to last forever" ray moaned he whimpered when he felt Kai retrieve his hand to pull off his shirt and yank off his sweats and boxer shorts. Thus leaving him naked in front of ray at the foot of the bed. Kai proceeded to crawl back onto the mattress but ray stopped him.

"Wait not yet" ray said sitting up. Kai stared at him confused and stimulated.

" I haven't seen you naked in a long time, I want to enjoy it" the neko-jin explained.

"Ray you can stare at me later were going to spend the rest of our lives together but right now I want you" Kai protested.

Kai pushed him back down he pulled off ray's shirt and slipped off his P.J bottoms. Moment's later Ray had his knees to the bed, elbows down as well, ass in the air and pillow to his face. Kai's thrusts were powerful and hard. He heard ray scream nonsense into the pillow as he plunged in and out of his hot anal. Ray removed the pillow out of his face and now had his hands on the bed instead of his elbows.

"Harder" ray moaned

Kai slowed his thrusts and asked ray, " you sure? I don't want to hurt you".

Ray nodded in response. Kai began to pick up the past pounding in deeper and faster into the neko-jin. Ray squeezed his eyes shut and clawed at the bed sheets, His toes curled.

"RAY!" Kai moaned. Ray felt Kai tremble as he moaned even louder. The Russian came deep within ray he could feel it in his stomach. Kai slowed down licked his index finger and swirled it over ray's soft ass cheek.

"Please Kai don't stop" ray pleaded tears formed in his eyes.

Kai didn't want to disappoint ray so he continued to pound in him. Trying to stay focussed but he just thrusts mindlessly into the raven hared. This continued on for several minutes Kai kept thrusting harder and as fast as he could.

"Ray I'm exhausted I cant keep up with you I'm going limp and I might pull a muscle" Kai said slowing his thrust and pulling out of ray. Kai flopped on his back beside ray and noticed some parts of the bed were damp and sticky, Ray had cummed almost all over the sheets.

"Oh ray" Kai sighed pulling his angle close to him and kissed his forehead. Ray started to turn red he noticed the mess he made and felt embarrassed; He sunk his head onto Kai's chest. Kai just smirked and roamed his fingers through the neko-jins silky hair.

"Don't be embarrassed it proves that I did a good job" Kai reinsured him, whipping off the sweat on ray's face. He could feel Kai's chest moving up and down, he was obviously still trying to catch his breath.

"I'm sorry I wore you out" ray said shyly.

"But it was fun, was it not?" Kai asked.

Ray nodded and closed his eye's they both drifted into a light sleep when kenjalia came in the room yelling. "DADDY! DADDY! IM GOING TO BE LATE FOR SHCOOLLLL". Ray opened his eyes and sat up realizing the sun was out and that they were up all night, he saw that Kai had fallen asleep and was laying there arms. Legs spread naked on the bed for his daughter's virgin eyes to see. Luckily ray was quick enough to throw the covers over both of them.

"DADDY COME ON!" kenjalia yanked on his hand.

" Sweetie hold on a sec will yea I'm not ready" ray whispered trying not to wake up the exhausted Russian.

"BUT DADDY IT'S ALREADY 1… 2…" she counted "8! O'CLOCK" kenjalia demanded.

Ray didn't' want to get out of bed he wanted to sleep in, with Kai but he can't keep his daughter from her education.

"Okay, okay keep your voice down honey, I'll call for someone to take you to school" ray said " now go get something to eat".

Kenjalia skipped out and hopped downstairs. Ray slowly lay back down and removed the sheets from Kai's face hoping he didn't suffocate to death. He giggled at the silly face Kai was making; he was truly blissful at the moment. Few minutes later Kai flinched, yawned then fluttered his eyes open. He stared at ray in a light gaze followed with a smile.

"Morning" Kai groaned, he sat up bringing ray with him. Kai clutched the back of ray's head and gave him a passionate kiss.

"I love you ray" Kai said smiling.

" I love you to" ray smiled back.

By the time ray got in class it was almost over he had fallen asleep for the last 15 minutes of it. He walked down the hall and decided to go straight to study hall instead of waiting for Eddie (his best friend). Ray tried to read but he couldn't concentrate. He was thinking about Kai. He'd forgotten how wonderful sex with Kai was.

_**Just when I thought my life was over Kai comes back to me umm how great is that! I wonder what he's doing, is he thinking about me? I did leave him home alone…WHAT AM I STUPID! I just let an ex-convicted in my house unattended. What am I saying it's Kai! My Kai! And… I…love him! I trust him, I need him, that was the first night I never had that dream**… oh **Tala I miss you, but you told me to love again, I'll always love you no matter what**. _

"BOO!" a voice taunted.

Ray jumped a tad and snapped back into reality.

"What you thinking? You look so out of it today and you slept in professor garrisons class do you know what he'd do to you if he found out about that?" Eddie asked.

"Nothing" Ray smiled

"I know that look you got sexed up good last night didn't you? That explains why you were snoozing in class, you were up all night getting your freak on weren't you?" Eddie teased.

Ray laughed "maybe".

"Hey, hey don't leave me in the dark fill me in!" Eddie insisted.

"Okay, okay you would have never guest what actually happened…

When ray got home he was greeted by an over excited kenjalia. Kai had picked her up after school so he wouldn't go through the trouble himself.

"HI DADDY!" kenjalia greeted.

"HEY HONEY! Why you so happy? What happened at school?" ray asked picking up his daughter and held her by his waist.

"SCHOOL WAS FUN! BUT ME AND Kai PLAYED SIMON SAYS AND I WON!" she yelled.

Ray grinned and placed his daughter on the counter, were he found Kai getting some ice cream that kenjalia asked for earlier.

"Yea! Yea! Butterscotch my favorite " kenjalia pranced as she picked up the bowl, jumped off the counter, ran into the living room and sat in front of the TV. Ray rolled his eyes and sighed.

"Had a rough day?" Kai asked walking over to ray and resting his forearms over ray's shoulders.

"Umm sort of I just really wanted to get back home". Ray smiled and gave Kai a light kiss on the lips.

"Really" Kai mumbled.

"Yea" ray said between light kisses.

"You want to come up stairs then?" Kai asked with a smirk on his sexy face.

"Hell yes! But what about kenja" ray answered a bit disappointed.

They both looked over to the living room and stared at kanjalia pigging out on the ice cream.

"She looks pretty distracted" Kai lightly laughed.

Kai raised an eyebrow and looked towards the stairs then glanced back at ray. The neko-jin nodded and they both ran up the stairs. Kai roughly kissed ray and pushed him onto the bed; their tongues explored each other's mouth. He pushed ray's shirt up exposing his soft peach skin. Kai kissed every inch of the raven hair's chest. Here and there ray could feel his lovers warm wet tongue slid against his navel area. Kai roamed his hands up and down ray's upper thigh; ray looked down and saw a wide smirk on Kai's face. **_What is he smirking at _**then ray noticed the huge bulge in his boxers and rolled his head back. The Russian stood up and slid off his own clothes then lay back on the bed. Kai's face at the neko-jin stiff member. Ray moaned when he felt Kai wraps his warm mouth around his throbbing erection. Ray thrust his hips up almost gagging Kai. He sucked and massages the shaft of ray's member. The neko-jin moaned even louder while tugging on the Russians silk navy hair. Ray couldn't take it anymore Kai was licking. Sucking and rubbing the right spots. With aloud moan and holler ray came within Kai's mouth. To his surprise he swallowed it all and licked him clean, when he was done he trailed kisses back up to ray's neck.

" I love you" ray whispered, his body so close to Kai's.

Ray looked into Kai's crimson eyes and saw the silent question, he nodded in response, he felt Kai enter his heated anal. Ray squirmed and clawed at Kai's back.

"Umm relax ray would yea, your acting like it's your first time stay still, I'm pretty sure you've done this enough with tala!" Kai groaned thrusting into ray a bit too hard making him gasp in pain.

"What's that suppose to mean?" ray asked his voice now filled with sadness. **_Why is Kai being so rough with me…?_**

Kai ignored the question and kept thrusting his body began to tremble as he came deep in his angel. Kai moaned and laid his sweaty body on top of rays. Kai panted heavily as he tried to hold himself up on his elbows. He leaned in to kiss ray but the neko-jin moved away.

"What's the matter?" Kai asked still puzzled. He figured it was a good time to get up but he didn't he wanted to be close to ray. Then it hit Kai his comment he made earlier, (god he was so sensitive). Ray pushed the Russian away and sat up ignoring his aching behind and pulled on his boxers and pants.

"It's been a while kenjalia shouldn't be alone downstairs" ray said flatly.

" Listen ray I'm sorry I was just tense I didn't mean to say that ray? Ray! Ray!" Kai called out as ray left the room.

Ray walked down the staircase slowly, tears stinging his eyes. Why did Kai have to say that? Why is he being so rough with ray? He could have had some warning at least. He knows he didn't really mean it everyone gets a little sexual tension right? But it still hurt. He felt like he was being used again…what was going on? Was his happy fairy tale ending? Tears rolled down his cheeks as he looked out the window, when he heard footsteps coming towards him he quickly whipped away his tears. Ray turned around and saw Kai carrying kenjalia on his back.

"Alright kenja this is the last stop, I have to go now okay" Kai said putting her down and walked towards the door.

"awwwwwwwww!' kenjalia wined as she followed Kai.

Ray just watched Kai leave through the front door and said nothing, he wanted to say something so badly but if he did he would have started sobbing. He was getting mad over nothing.

" Bye-bye Kai!" kenjalia waved

"Bye, be a good girl okay" Kai told her.

Kenjalia giggled, " I will".

Ray opened his mouth and tried to say something but Kai interrupted with a "bye ray" and in minutes later he was down the street and gone. Ray stood there in shock **_did Kai just walk out on me…but he just got back. _**He watched the closed door as a pool of tears streamed down his face, at this point he didn't care if kenjalia saw him crying all he cared about was the fact Kai was gone and may not come back again.

It had been two months and five days since ray had heard from Kai. He'd dropped out of school and stopped going to the public park with kenjalia. Ray leaned over the kitchen counter and flipped through some pictures and newspaper ads. **_It was almost like yesterday when Kai and I were at this counter sneaking kisses when kenja wasn't looking. Why does everyone leave me? I shouldn't let thing's get me down Kai's just upset, but were is he? Where would he be staying? _**. Ray pondered in his head when his eyes caught the attention of a newspaper ad. **_$$ VOLTAIRE HIWTARI $$ _**the ad listed top five billionaires and his name was next to Oprah Winfrey on the list. **_Hay isn't this Kai's grandfather? WOW! HE'S ONE OF THE BILLIONAIRES that's where Kai must be staying with his rich grandfather… who wouldn't? He was telling me about the only place that he'd ever go even forced was his grandfathers. I guess I could give it a try but he lives all the way in Russia. _**Ray thought he jotted down the address and ran to the phone. He called up Eddie and begged him to watch kenjalia for a couple of days Eddie agreed with a little persuasion. Ray leaped up and down he, was so excited he forgot all the bad things that ever happened with him and Kai, he just at least wanted to see him. After what seemed like years of prancing, dancing and cheering ray realized he had some packing to do.

Ray sat at the airport seats, he waited for his flight to get in, ray watched the other airplanes take off and land. For some reason he wasn't so excited nor was he smiling from ear to ear. He actually felt kind of sick he let his nerves get the best of him. When ray's plane arrived he got on and was seated beside an old lady that talked too much about her grandson but luckily he fell asleep for most of the flight. By the time he'd waken up the plane was landing. Ray stood up and grabbed some of his begs from the beg carriers on top of his seat. When he got off the plane the harsh ice air smacked him in the face; he pulled his jacket closer to his body and walked to the nearest pay phone. He dialed a number and waited for someone to answer.

"Hello?" the person answered

"Hey is everything okay?" ray asked

"Umm yeah why?" the man replied.

"Just nervous I'm here you know in Russia I'm waiting for the traveling bus" the neko-jin expressed while looking around.

"It's alright ray it's me Eddie trust me everything is going to be alright." Eddie reinsured him.

"Alright well my bus is here its suppose to take me as close to the palace I just hope Kai's there but anyway I got to go bye, bye Eddie."

"Okay good luck bye." he replied.

Ray hung up the phone and got on the bus, (yes he's a good father he needs to check up on his daughter!) he felt all the other people staring at him. The only seat available was one all the way at the back. Ray slowly walked towards it and sat down. Some old blonde Russian women gave him a dirty look as he slouched down in his seat. Ray sighed and pulled his begs closer to his chest and closed his eyes into a fantasy world.

Ray woke up to the bus driver shaking him he was yelling at him to get up in Russian, ray stood up and got off the bus with his belongings. It was snowing extremely hard when he finally realized were he was. He sneezed as he shields his eyes from the snow blowing in his direction. Ray gasped at the sight of an enormous four story high mansion with at least two wings to it. **_This has to be the place_** ray slowly climbed up the icy steps**_ for a rich person you'd figure they'd put some salt on them. _**When he reached the top of the steps he took a deep breath and rang the doorbell, minutes later someone came to answer it.

"Yes hiwtari estate how may I help you?" the man asked.

"Umm is Kai here?" ray asked peeking into the mansion. **_What am I thing I just can't come here and bluntly ask for Kai like he's my neighbor. _**

" And you are?" the man asked.

" Ray, ray kon" he answered.

" Master Kai is not here at the moment but I'll tell him you dropped by" the man with an English accent said while proceeding to close the door. (Funny this is Russia were in you'd figure they'd have a Russian accent? But English accents are so much better… not to be disrespectful...)

"Nonsense there's no need for that he could just come in and wait for Kai to get back." An old man suggested and took hold of the door pulling it open again.

"If that's how you want it sir," the English butler said grabbing rays begs and walked inside.

"As for you I'm Voltaire hiwtari dearest grandfather of Kai and you must be ray I've heard so many stories about you." Voltaire said putting his arm around ray's shoulder and walked him inside.

The mansion was huge! And everything looked so expensive it was like one of those fancy homes you see on TV. Ray was over whelmed with all the wonderful paintings and photos of Kai and other people but he was focussed on Kai.

"This place is really nice" ray complemented.

"Well people work hard for everything they have" Voltaire said watching ray walk towards the pictures of him and Kai as a child.

Voltaire's eyes drifted down rays back and onto his well-toned booty, Voltaire so wanted that all to himself. He bit his lip to fight back the moan of pleasure. The curious look on ray's face made him want him even more. Oh what the hell by this time Voltaire had walked up behind ray and placed his hands on ray's hips.

"Would you like to check out upstairs and the bedrooms?" Voltaire whispered pushing up against ray's small body.

Ray gave out a low gasp and closed his eyes. What was he thinking was he actually getting turned on by Kai's grandfather? And was he hitting on him? Voltaire rubbed rays hip and gazed his hand over ray's lower body.**_ He knows were to touch me his touch is like Kai's gentle ones_**

"Umm Kai" a soft moan escaped rays lips his eyes still shut.

"Well master Kai home so soon?" the English mans voice called out entering the room.

Kai walked in to see his grandfather hovering over someone. Ray snapped his eyes open and pushed Voltaire back. He turned around and stared at Kai.

"Ray?" Kai asked stepping back.

Ray just smiled and ran up to Kai.

" I missed you so much!" the neko-jin wrapped his arms around him eyes filled with tears and joy.

"I missed you too" Kai said " I'm sorry for anything I've done to upset you, how'd you get here and where's kenjalia and why are you crying?" Kai asked in concern.

" I had to find you your one of the best things that happened to me and I'm not letting you go so I got on the next pane that I could, I left kenjalia with one of my best friends. And I don't know why I'm crying! Maybe because I love you so much! And I'm scared to lose you!" ray sobbed hugging Kai tighter.

Voltaire watched in envy as Kai rubbed ray's back and whispered claming words to him. Kai stared back at his grandfather and kissed ray then told one of his butlers to bring ray upstairs into his room and wait for him there. When ray left the room and was out of sight Kai walked towards his grandfather.

"Stay away from him." Kai demanded and walked up stairs. Voltaire was left standing in the living room in anger he smashed his fist against the wall and left the room with rage.

When Kai came upstairs to his room he found that ray was no longer crying nor was he naked. (Big disappointment) ray was sitting at the edge of the bed staring down at his feet. He was kind of feeling guilty about the whole thing with Kai it was stupid of him to get upset; there was no point to it. Kai walked towards the neko-jin and sat down beside him taking hold of his hand.

"What's wrong?" Kai asked using his free hand to stroke rays thigh hoping to get him in the mood.

Ray just ignored the gesture and got up walking towards Kai's dresser and glancing in the mirror.

"Do you love me?" ray asked staring at his reflection.

"Of course I do, I love you more then anything why would you ask me that?" Kai responded getting up and standing behind ray.

"I don't know…" ray looked in the mirror at Kai who was sucking on his neck.

"Let me take your mind off things" Kai said grabbing rays waist and directing him to the bed again.

Ray's back hit the soft mattress as he tasted ever inch of Kai's warm mouth. Kai lifted up ray's shirt and ray did the same with his.

"Kai…" ray whispered against Kai's ear when he felt his pants being yanked off followed wit his boxers. Kai took hold of the neko-jins hands and pinned them down above his head. Ray spread his legs and shut his eyes waiting for Kai's entrance. Kai pushed in and felt rays muscles clamp down causing him to moan, he took a few minutes so ray would relax.

"Are you okay?" Kai asked just to pass time.

Ray nodded his head and squirmed trying to signal Kai to go on. He took the advantage and began to move in and out of ray with a slow calming rhythm then started to pick up again. Ray loved it but other things were running through his mind.** _Oh god this feels so good I should be screaming Kai's name by now what's wrong with me? I need to feel his love for me and I need it now _**when ray came back into reality he opened his eyes and looked up at Kai. He was pounding deep and hard into him he could see the sweat on his face and the tears and pleasure in his eyes.

"Kai?" ray asked in a low tone.

Kai looked down and met rays amber eyes.

"Harder…please" ray begged

Ray looked at Kai as a smirk grew on his face then they kissed once more. He positioned his hands on both sides of rays head and began plunging deeper into ray hitting that spot that made him tremble.

"Kai!" ray moaned grasping onto his forearms.

Kai continued to plunge in and out of his beautiful angel even after he reached his climax. Ray's body was trembling as his eyes watered. He clawed on Kai's arms even tighter leaving marks. Kai could feel ray tighten his grip on his member. His moans and groans were getting louder he was slipping in and out of conciseness his body was numbing. Ray hissed as he yelled out Kai's name spilling his seeds over himself and Kai. Kai moaned once more then pulled out of ray he rolled over and on to his back beside him. They both lay in silent panting heavily trying to catch their breaths.

"That was so wonderful Kai it was nothing I ever felt before." Ray purred.

"I made by angel have his first orgasm" Kai said rubbing rays cheek with his thumb.

Ray smiled "I'm tired". Kai kissed him one more time then whispered " sleep all you want you deserve it." Ray purred once more then closed his eyes resting his head on Kai's sweaty chest.

When morning hit ray was disappointed to see that Kai hadn't slept in with him. Ray sat up and stretched scanning the room for Kai. He heard the shower turn off, followed by footsteps approaching the door. Kai walked in with a small white towel around his waist, his chest still dripping water with his hair still damped from the shower. **_Seeing a naked Kai is a great way to start the day_** Ray smiled and patted the bed gently with his palm signaling Kai to come and sit with him. Accepting the request Kai walked over to the bed.

"Morning" Kai greeted leaning in for a kiss.

Ray giggled "morning" and pressed his lips to Kai's. "Umm pancakes has nothing on you".

Kai smiled lovingly then pulled away. Walking back to his dresser and pulled out clothes for the day.

"Come on take a shower and get dressed we're having guests...well "a" guest" Kai said pulling on the last article of clothing he had prepared.

Ray yawned and pouted laying back down on his elbows "who?"

"HEY! HEY! HEY!"(FAT ALBERT! HAHAHA I'M JUST FUCKING WITH YOU GUYS, BACK TO THE STORY!) A voice practically screamed barging into the room. Ray quickly threw the covers over his naked body and sat up once again. **_Damn haven't they heard of knocking?_**

" Her" Kai stated a bit annoyed. " This is…" Kai was cut off with a smack to his rear.

"I can introduce myself! Thank you very much, Jesus Christ Kai what a firm ass you got there" the girl winked and proceeded to talk again. " Hi I'm keylee yes, yes I know nice to meet you blah, blah, blah" she smiled.

"She…" Kai was cut off again.

"Hey! Don't you no its rude to interrupt someone when there speaking, god Kai! Have you no manners" keylee interrupted as well. "Anyway as I was saying I'm keylee Kai's wise older sister! Okay well almost sister we grew up together."

"Funny Kai never mentioned you before" ray said glancing at Kai who was crossing his arms and rolling those fabulous crimson eyes.

"Well that's a pity do you know what you've been missing out on? Of course not but anyway it was nice chatting with you for a while we'll continue this later, I can see someone was a little busy." Keylee said then walked to the door but before she left she turned to Kai and whispered. "He's a cute one don't go breaking his heart like the others."

"Sorry about that if I knew she was still like this I would have warned you" Kai said drying off his hair.

"Maybe she can fill me in on how you were as a child and all your embarrassing moments growing up" ray laughed.

"Fat chance" Kai smirked stepping out the room " and hurry up I don't want to be left alone downstairs with her."

**_I wonder why Kai hasn't ever told me that he had a sister, well some what of a sister. Come to think of it he hasn't really ever told me about his past… maybe I have been missing out on this keylee girl maybe she can fill me in on Kai's past and things I really don't know about him._** After contemplating for a good 5 minutes the neko-jin decided to go take a shower and get dressed looking forward with his day with Kai and keylee.

When ray came downstairs into the living room area he found Kai lying down on the coach with one arm supporting his head up while the other rest on his muscular chest, his legs slightly separated. **_I swear Kai could be a model he's so gorgeous. _**Ray shifted his attention to the next coach were he found keylee sitting on the armrest. Now that ray was up and wide-awake he noticed how pretty she was. Her dark navy hair flowed down past her shoulders and her eye's blood red, not quite like Kai's her cheekbones were ideal shaped and her puffy rose pink lips made her look so kiss-able. **_If I weren't gay I'd so fuck her_** The outfit she was wearing really complemented every cure on her slender body. She wore a tight black sleeveless shirt that extended down past her butt, which brought out her curvy hips. A red thick belt circled around her waist followed by her tight white pants exposing her fit thighs. To top it all off she rocked black boots that went up to her cabs with several straps going across each boot.

"What? You think I'm hideous?" keylee asked ray sarcastically sliding off the armrest and standing up. Ray realized he was staring blankly at her and blinked a couple of times.

"No, I'm sorry your actually quite pretty" ray blushed looking away from her only to catch Kai's gave which looked at him with jealousy in his eyes.

"Why thank you you're not to bad yourself, I'm so sorry I didn't ask your name how rude am I." Keylee asked winking at ray making him feel uneasy.

"Oh my names ray" the neko-jin replied forcing a smile.

**_Is my ray flirting with keylee? Out of all the people in the world keylee? I can not tolerate this any longer. _**Kai thought while getting up and proceeded to walk towards ray. He slid his arm around ray's waist and pulled him close to his body.

"Moving on, why are you here anyway keylee? When we talked on the phone you said it was important and it doesn't seem like you're in a rush to tell me what you have to say." Kai said narrowing his eyes at her.

"Can't an old friend visit her dearest little brother with out being questioned." Keylee stated.

"WHY DO YOU KEEP SAYING THAT I'M NOT YOUR BROTHER AND I NEVER WILL BE! YOUR JUST SOME GIRL MY GRANDFATHER BOUGHT AND USED AS A SEX TOY AFTER HE GOT TIRED OF USING ME AND THE OTHERS!" Kai yelled in frustration.

"Kai!" ray smacked Kai on the arm in surprise of Kai's sudden rude out burst.

"WHAT ARE YOU IMPLYING? THAT THE 12 YEARS WE SPENT IN MISERY MENT NOTHING TO YOU! ALL THOSE TIMES YOU CAME TO ME CRYING AFTER HE TOUCHED YOU MEANT NOTHING? DO YOU EVEN REMEMBER WHAT YOU SAID TO ME BEFORE I LEFT?" keylee yelled in Kai's face and in rays thou she didn't mean to.

"I…" Kai was speechless.

"I DIDN'T THINK SO! YOU TOLD ME THAT I WAS LIKE A SISTER TO YOU AND YOU LOVED ME AND TO NEVER FORGET YOUR UNGRATEFUL ASS!" keylee cried fling her arms in the air and stormed out the mansion doors.

Ray stood there in disbelief he slowly pride Kai's arm from his waist and went to go stand in front of him. Kai just stared at ray right in his eyes, ray stared back hoping to hear an answer from him but nothing came. They both just stood there looking at each other. Ray couldn't take the silence anymore so he took it in his advantage to ask Kai what was going on with him and keylee.

"12 years? What's that about? Your grandfather…he did what to you?" ray asked calmly still never breaking eye contact with Kai.

Kai was speechless he didn't know what to say to ray, he would have been lying to himself and ray if he told him that keylee was lying about everything. He never wanted to remember his past, he tried so hard to block it out. The best thing he could think of saying was "12 years… she…my grandfather…I…don't…" Kai trailed off subject.

**_What's wrong with you Kai! You never get all choked up like this, even with ray! Think of something you sound like a complete asshole! Pull yourself together man! Think of something "Kai like" to say, it would be nice if it was about NOW! _**The voice in the back of Kai's head demanded of him.

"It's not important right now, she's always like this, don't worry about it my angel." Kai said pulling ray close to him again for a heated kiss.

**_I hate it when he uses his delicious lips to distract me but hey I'm not complaining._** Ray though wrapping his arms around Kai's neck forcing him down so their kiss was more intense.

"Kai?" ray broke the kiss in need of oxygen " you should go find her and apologize to your s.… keylee."

"But ray…" Kai was cut off. (People are so rude these days)

"But nothing she's obviously hurt and is or was someone important in your life the much you can do is say sorry. If not for her then for me please Kai" ray told Kai and lightly kissed him on the lips.

_**Why was ray so smart at times **_

"Okay but if I'm not back in an hour or so call for a search party." Kai smiled gracefully walking towards the door, grabbing his coat and throwing it over his shoulder. "I'm serious okay, I'll be back bye."

"hahahaha okay bye" ray laughed.

Kai blew a kiss to ray and stepped out the front door. Ray leaped into the kitchen to watch Kai from the window to make sure he just didn't hide out in a bush for an hour and say he went to go look for keylee but turned out she died or something crazy like that. Fortunately Kai had a heart and in matters of seconds he disappeared down the street. Mean while ray sighed and went to go search the fridge for something to eat for breakfast.

Kai new exactly were he was going as he ran down the icy streets of Russia. Whenever keylee was upset about something she would go to this park with a huge statue of some man. Kai was a bit sad to see keylee sitting on the bench with no jacket and her knees to her chest with her head down. He swiftly walked across the street and sat on the bench beside her. Keylee looked up at the sudden extra weight beside her only to come face to face with Kai.

"Leave me alone…"she said putting her head back down.

"Your going to freeze out here." Kai placed his arm around her shoulder only to feel her shiver under his warm touch.

"So what, you don't care anyway I'm only a toy your grandfather used for his sick pleasure." she sniffed trying to break free of Kai's grasp on her but only to be held tighter.

"So was I but that's over, I didn't mean what I said." Kai replied focussing his eyes on her face.

"You know a wise person once told me that the truth always comes out when your angry." She said leaning into Kai's embrace.

"I told you that," Kai smirked placing a light kiss on her forehead.

"I know" she smiled up at him. "I'm sorry for any problems I caused you, I know how much you wanted to forget the past and I just brought it back up again.

"It's okay your forgiven, and I'm sorry." Kai said standing up and bringing keylee up with him. "Lets get back it's been more that an hour if ray was listening to what I was saying, (I beg to differ) he would have called the search party by now. She smiled and walked by Kai's side half his coat hanging around her and the other half around himself. By the time they reached back to the mansion it was around 5:30 p.m. they both had stopped for something to eat and to talk for awhile. Kai unlocked the door and stepped in followed by keylee clinging on to the back of his shirt.

"KKKKKAAAAAIIIIII!" a voice came out of the doorway screaming. "I was just about to call the search party I was so worried about you!" Ray flung his arms around Kai's neck hugging him tightly; Kai slipped his arms around ray's waist and hugged him back. "Never do that again okay!" ray left several kisses all over Kai's face. Kai just squinted his eyes trying not to get ray's tongue in his eyes.

"Okay, okay I wont I promise" Kai laughed pulling ray's arms off of his neck

"Oh hey keylee, You guys made up?" ray asked adjusting his shirt that had risen up when he flung his body at Kai.

keylee was laughing hysterically at the little show the couple gave her and only managed to say "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Ray just smiled "I'm guessing that was a yes."

Kai laughed dragging keylee inside and onto the living room floor only to have her laugh even harder when she saw the expression on ray's face when he watched Kai walk away from him. Kai just rolled his eyes and walked into the kitchen to get some water for keylee to calm down.

"I missed staring at your hot-tush all morning Kai" ray whispered into Kai's ear.

"I love you too." Kai lifting ray onto the counter and placed butterfly kisses down his neck.

"Umm Kai lets go upstairs" ray moaned closing his eyes and rolling his head back.

"Why so I can fuck you hard up your tight hot ass." Kai whispered huskily into ray's ear, making him moan in agreement. Ray jumped off the counter and grabbed his lover's hand dragging him up stairs into their room, locking the door behind them. Ray pushed Kai onto the bed and straddled him between his thighs, yanking up his white shirt that exposed his smooth chest. Ray nipped and licked the soft flesh leaving Kai to roam his hands were every they wanted to go. Ray felt Kai begin to rise and slid his hand beneath Kai's pants and massage his erection. Kai bit back a moan trying not to surrender under ray's control but that was no use the moan only came out louder, causing ray to rub harder on Kai's sensitive area. Ray smirked knowing that he was torturing the Russian, which also turned him on even more. Kai opened his eyes not a ware of when he closed them to look up at ray who had a seductive smirk on.

"Why'd you stop?" Kai asked gazing his hands over ray's thighs.

"You'll see" ray whispered and put two of his fingers to Kai's mouth, making him sucking on them for a while then slid them away only to be placed into Kai's entrance. Kai bucked his hips at the sudden contact and gave out a throatily moan. Ray proceeded to move his fingers in and out of the Russian at a clam rhythm then began to quicken up. When he felt that Kai had been stretched enough he removed his fingers and replaced them with his fully hardened cock, he continued the in and out rhythm that he started with his fingers. Kai wasn't us to ray penetrating him and felt dizzy, he couldn't concentrate on the task at hand. His body began to tremble his vision was fogged with tears of lust and passion. He hadn't noticed how long ray had been plunging in and out of him, until he heard ray hiss realizing he was reaching his climax. Ray pounded into Kai hard one last time hitting Kai's 'special' spot and felt his walls gave in on him as they both moaned loudly in sink. Ray collapsed onto Kai's sweaty chest breathing deeply, Kai wrapped his arms around rays waist pulling there bodies closer together.

"Your amazing" Kai said as a tear rolled down his cheek.

"I've never heard you scream so loud" ray smirked gently gazing his hand over his lovers chest.

" I wasn't screaming…"

"Okay…" ray rolled his eyes snuggling his head on Kai's torso.

"I love you ray"

" I love you more" ray smiled and let the heavy feeling of sleep drift him away as the same for Kai.

what do u think? love it? love it not? please review! one love


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